Rules simple u make grant a person wish and make it bad then make a wish your self.

[ Translation by Loki: You grant the wish of the poster before you in a corrupt manner. Than make your own wish. ]

I wish i had an airplane.

Granted but the airplane runs on diamonds.

I wish I had a massage.

granted but edward scissor-hands is your masseuse.
i wish i had a horse.

Granted but it's a paper mache' horse that just falls apart.

I wish I had a kitty.

granted but it has rabies
i wish i had a katana

Granted but the blade breaks and cuts your own arm off.

I wish I had better headphones.

Granted ,but listening to the music makes you go deaf.

I wish i knew how to build a computer

LOL THIS SOUNDs FUN!
Granted, but your computer is poorly made and blows up on you.
I wish I had a candee.

Granted, but it's the ugliest woman alive, her name is actually Candee.

I wish I had a poompkin.

granted assuming u meant pumkin and the pumpkin is 4 years old and smelly rotting with bugs and the like.
i wish i was president of america

Granted, but no one votes for you and you are assasinated at your speech-giving.
i wish for DEATH TO ALL HUMANS.

granted but then god ressurects them and send u to hell.
I wish i had a 3 scoop chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream with gummy bears and rainbow sprinkles and hot metly fudge drizzeled on top and whip cream with cherry on top also a cinnamon stick in it.

Granted, but it has arsenic in it and you're poisoned to death.
I wish to become LAHARL, OVERLORD OF THE NETHERWORLD

granted but no one is in netherworld so ur lonely so u suicide and resurect back on earth

I wish i portable bathroom....

Granted, but your bathroom is a bucket on your ass, so you sit in your own filth all day.

I wish I had more big red.